moving or fading?

i don't know..but it seems, slowly i feel like empty..
the thought of missing you feels empty..
it's like day by day..you're fading away
is it me slowly moving on? or our feelings not that great so it can easily fade away?
i wish one day when we're meet again...
we're not a stranger..but a story..

hurt

aku rindu ketika aku masih sangat naif...ketika segalanya tidak serumit ini...
ketika aku masih sangatlah aku, tanpa label tag dari society yang membuat sekarang  menjadi lebih rumit...
mungkin ini pertama kalinya,ketika aku berusaha mencintai seseorang,ketika di umur ku yang semakin dewasa aku mencoba menjadi lebih serius dalam menjalani sesuatu,yah mungkin ini pertama kalinya juga ketika aku harus mejatuhkan segala pilihan pada satu sosok...
sosok itu adalah dia

what's so great about him? what's so great about us? we are not greater than any realationship out there. kita hanyalah sepasang manusia yang menjadi satu dan mencoba berjalan bersama, layaknya pasangan kekasih lain. but when it comes to end, i can't hold myself....

berkali-kali aku jatuh menangis,tapi berkali kali juga aku mencoba berpikir logis,tertawa,berjalan layaknya manusia normal, tetapi ada satu moment yang tak bisa kusangkal...i miss him...a lot...i feel so fragile...he's like morphine, every pieces of me are craving his presence...
walaupun aku telah mencoba menghapus segalanya, aku tidak bisa benar-benar lupa akan segalanya, terkadang dia hanya akan datang sebentar,lalu menyisakan kerinduan luar biasa yang harus kutahan dengan tangisan...

but, what can i do?
perhaps you out there,...don't even think of me...
it's not me who don't realize that no matter what we can't be together...
it's just me who can't let you go from my heart yet...

a lot of things

i think its been more than 2 years already, that i hadn't blogged again...
when i saw the last post, i realized, everything has totally changed in 2 years...
amazing... so here are... i'm gonna show you...a lot of things that happened in me...

i'm 20 years old now, my dream changed, my purpose changed, my point of view in this life changed too.
my dream, i want to be famous, gettin know and close with new people, find my true love, getting married, having a trip in some countries, live my life to the fullest, loving and get loved with my family and closest friends,and of course my future partner of life:) it's like simple wishes right? but beause it's too simple,everyone not that simple to reach that kind of hapinness... have no regrets in this life :)

friends changed, parents day by day getting old, people around you were come and go....
but, in the process entered the new pace of my life, i wish i won't lose my self, my laugh, my sincerity, my integrity, and in this year, in this age, i will live my life in the mature ways, like everyone always said

"people changed, you changed, our self changed"

survive in college

today was sooo long and tired,
yes! baru aja gw selesai ospek selama 4 hari and guys itu cape bangettt....ngettt...tambahin s jadi bangetsss.
dan rasanya ngecapin tempet kulliah buat pertama kali itu rasanya nano-nano.
1.koko2 yang ganteng2,menawan,dewasa, dan semua pake baju bebass woyy....hahaha
2.jurusan gue yang mesti rajinnya naujubileeee.... soalnya gw ambil jurusan chinese literature, so tiap hari musti kudu belajaarrr...kalo gk besoknya bakalan lupa.
3. kegalauan gue karna stiap cewe pun tambah cantik and dewassa pake baju bebas, membuat gue merasa ikan asin di tengah ikan bakar ...hahha
4. letak kampus gue yang jauhhhhnyaaaaaaa ya aoloo!! gw harus berangkat jam 5.30 buat ngejar mata kuliah hahaha
5. MANDIRI! iinilahh yang dituntut... mandiri tanpa bergantung dengan satu temanpun, mandiri buat tg jawab ataas nilai gw sendiri, mandiri dalam urusan bersikap layaknya org dewasa.

kedewasaan gw harus dituntut disini, gw harus tau bahwa diluar ittu orang angat banyak dan beraneka ragam, ada yg lebih heboh, ada yg jauhh lebih pinter, and banyak lagi. so, gw belajar utuk gk mau selalu jadi 'center'. gw mau belajar gimana jadi seorang follower yang baik supaya somedy gw bisa menjadi leader untuk hidup gw sendiri. gw mau belajar ggimana foku ke sesuatu yg ebih berarti utk keputusan hidup gw dariada mikirin ego gw sendiri.
honestly, gw belum terbiasa sm adaptasi yg kaya begini, dimana gw harus menanggalkan sifat aktif gw buat gk mikirin status doang, tapi harus mikirin masa depan gw dan FOKUS!
that's soo hard, i never meantt to be like that...
lupain smua masa2 nya gaya-gayaan...eksis-eksis an...saing-saing an..
skrg adalah waktunya buat fokus,survived, and be responsible with our own choices
suka, gk suka...enak, gk enak gw harus ngelajaninnya thats it!!
be tough girl!
 

BFF= best freak friends

ok...i'll let you see my friends...they are the freakest one in the world :D but i love them sincerely..LOL

his name was gilbert, he is the only male among us, he's very funny, it'll be boring if we gather together without him. and i tell you something, when we were still in junior high, he was very fat LOL but now...you see..isn't he gorgeous? LOL

next, people often call her my twin, LOL! you know why...haha because she has that mole on the left, and i have a mole too on the right..LOL...and she is soo generous among us... she likes to treat us,
we call her "entid" and she is my shopping mate...

the last, her name is catharine, she is soo sexy, you can tell by her looks, right? lol she has that crazy things in her mind, and she has no shame lol... she is our driver,that's because she is the only one who can drive haha...

3 years ago

one month ago

2 months ago

 

 

 

 

we've been 6 years together...and i hope we can still hanging out together, although we'll be separated. FYI, we are in the same school when we were still in junior high, but when we went to high school, we had our own choice so we went different school, but fortunately we're still having fun together...it was delight and unforgettable...
there are so much funny things that i can't tell you one by one... but we've been through the sad and the happiest moments together..we fought,we cry, we laughed at the same time when we're together...
i love you guys... i love every sides of you guys, the bad and the good side...i love everything about you are...
you guys are wonderful ;*

high waist ombre pants ;D

hi long time no see bloggersss
today is my first time to show my style, actually i never post about fashion style, but this is totally different
because these clothes are my favorite..so check this out  ;D

i bought this shorts in somewhere..hehe i don't want to tell you guys..but it was branded...and i think it looks soo vintage that's why i love it .. :)

i bought 2 colors ombre hi -waisted pants...and this one more softer than the first one...so which one do you like????? if you like it..i can tell you where you could buy this pants ;)

the things that i want the most :*

nah... ini heels" sexy yang bikin semua cewe ngerasa keren..hehe... gue pengen jadi salah satu dari orang yg bisa milikin mereka di lemari sepatu gue sendiri, what?! in my own shelf! hehe realy adore them so much!!!! *smooch* ;*

this is beijing....the place where i want to lived the most :)


buat apa hidup di kota indah tanpa ditemani sebuah kamera keren?? isn't it??
that's why, i love this tool..it can record all the moment...and it could bring back some memories... i wish i will get this camera... pengen banget punya kamera ini buat ekspresi-in segala sesuatu yg ada di sekitar gw... well, dieem" gw jg punya chemistry buat camera loh :D... gw punya keinginan terpendam dlm fotografi, stiap gw liat karya fotografi yg amazing..it moved me to do something for make someone just like me when they saw same creation..just one word to describe this tool "amazing" ;D



england is beautiful too... ini juga salah satu yg ada dalam list gue... kota yang penuh sejarah dan dingin itu, i hope i could be there someday. satu hal yg bikin gue jatuh hati sama negara ini...especially london.. :D well kata orang, negara ini paling banyak musim hujannya..hehe unreasonable..tp bagi gw itulah yg bikin gw tertarik sm england...gua suka banget sama hujan,cuaca yang kelabu dan dingin..hem... itu karna mereka bs neduhin hati gue..hehe pokoknya there's something in england which make me fall in my deepest heart!

mungkin semua orang bisa pengin jadi berhasil punya bayak duit jadi orang yg banyak dikenal..tp bagi gue, gk perlu sampe sgituny kok :)
my life completely succeeded if... gue bs tinggal di slh satu tempat yg akan gue habisin separuh sisa hidup gue,hehe. gk perlu juga kerjaan luar biasa..hehe cuman kerjaan biasa di suatu perusahaan yg berhubungan sm bahasa dan penulisan ex;perusahaan penerbit, majalah..hehe
stiap pagi bangun dr mansion sederhana trus pergi kerja pake heels" cantik yg gue beli pake duit gaji gue sendiri..woahhhh!! what a good life!
sometimes in my spare time...gw bs pergi nglilingin london atau sekitarnya... desa nya yang masih natural atau klo di beijing bisa jalan-jalan di tman kota waktu musim gugur sama musin semi, sambil gandeng kamera SLR gue...hehe it will be a best scenery that i would record..
then, setiap bulan gue kirimin foto-foto gue disana ke keluarga yang disini..mereka pasti seneng.. hehe
it must not to be fabulous, just a simple wish for a beautiful life,,,
God...is it possible for me?? :)